I’m a few days late but I can’t let a year go by without writing my annual retrospect of this past year and manifesting the success, happiness and adventures I want for the upcoming one. I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling 2022! —Yes, that is a play on a Taylor Swift song.
The start of 2021 was a bleak one. I always found December and January very difficult months even before the Pandemic was a thing. Mainly because I am not a fan of Christmas and New Years and January is just the depressing month after all the forced happiness, hype and time off. Not only is there no holiday in January but the bills of Christmas past come back during this month to remind you how you went over budget than you intended to. On top of this we were in the midst of a lockdown and I was still sad about my previous failed relationship that crashed and burned in 2020’s dumpster fire. I remember hitting a depressing low and thinking it would be the theme of the year. Thankfully, I was very wrong about that.
In mid January I matched with someone named Andrew on Hinge. I remember seeing his notification pop up while I miserably watched a Kansas City Chiefs football game. “Now that’s a pretty awesome picture.” was his message for the silly picture I had put up for the prompt “The moment I knew my modelling career was over.” I remember rolling my eyes. I wasn’t feeling it that night and didn’t even bother opening the app to check his profile further.
The next morning I woke up a bit more optimistic. I decided to circle back and check out this guy’s profile. A majority of his photos had another person in it with him except for two. A faux pas in the online dating world if you ask me. However one picture caught my eye. It was one of just him in the outdoors. His smile seemed very genuine in it, he had kind eyes and had on this wind breaker with the Barcelona FC emblem on it. Now, I’m more of a Real Madrid woman myself but I was interested to know his fandom for the “beautiful game.”
I messaged back with a thank you and next thing I knew we were messaging pretty regularly. While it turned out he wasn’t a fan of soccer in the slightest, conversation was easy and interesting between us. I wanted to meet him after about a week of texting back and forth daily. However, we were in the midst of a lockdown in the middle of winter so I had to wait. We spoke for almost an entire month and at the beginning of February we decided to schedule a phone call that ended up lasting 4 hours. Hearing his voice made me more invested in wanting to meet him in person. On February 15th we took a chance and met for a walk at Trinity Bellwoods park right before a storm was suppose to hit our city. The walk lasted 3 hours. At the end of it Andrew offered to walk me to my bus stop and wait with me. I remember thinking how chivalrous this offer was. He lived closer to the park than I did and after walking around in the cold for as long as we did he still wanted to wait until I got on the bus safely. By the time I arrived home that day I had an invitation for a second date the upcoming Saturday.
Something I learned during our first few dates was how much this man valued my safety. He always made sure I went home in an Uber from his place on his dime regardless of what time I left. This stood out for me. I never really considered my own safety and always tend to take the TTC home regardless what time it was. I only ever took a Lyft or an Uber when it was an “emergency.” Before this, I had never been sent home in a taxi or Uber by a gentleman before and it showed me how low my bar has been all this time.
Our relationship progressed slowly and quickly at the same time. We saw one another every Saturday, taking turns at each other’s apartment since the rest of the city was still locked down. We watched movies, cooked dinner and grabbed coffee. We went on walks in our neighbourhoods while holding hands and talked until it was time for one of us to go back home. On March 30th we became an official couple after I received a hand written letter in the mail with a boyfriend application inside from him. It was such a beautiful and romantic gesture. Our Saturdays eventually became weekends and when we both could swing it we saw each other on weekdays in between. When the world began opening up again we finally began going on dates outside our confines. It’s been a wonderful journey together.
Some other highlights of 2021 besides finding love was making new friends! I decided to try playing Dungeons and Dragons thanks to my friend Stephanie and joined a campaign where I met some really cool people including my Dungeon Master Jonny who is one of the sweetest and most encouraging people. I am now an active part of his awesome podcast The Diecast Podcast where my shy dragon-born sorcerer Meraxes has been slowly unfolding into her own during our quests. I also met my boyfriend’s wonderful group of friends. I got to really bond with them during a weekend cottage trip to Cloyne, Ontario. I was also introduced to one of my best friend Cecelia’s other circles and met two wonderful ladies Sarah and Amy. I also got closer with some ex-coworkers I used to work with Annie and Chia after they left my company. It turns out Annie and I share the same birthdate! What are the odds?!
I took advantage of our community public pools and went swimming a few times this summer. I checked out the awesome Andy Warhol exhibit at the AGO and attended film screenings again when cinemas opened. I spent an amazing weekend with one of my oldest and best friends Emily. We even took a day trip to Fort Eerie to try Matty’s Matheson’s Meats + Three and accidentally crossed to the American border. My sister from another mister Emily—I have two best friends named Emily—came to visit me and we went on a full blown food tour and laughed until our bellies hurt instead of going to bed at a reasonable hour.
I celebrated my birthday in a restaurant surrounded by my friends and played dodgeball again! I came up with an awesome couples costume idea my boyfriend was game for and made it come to life with the help of my mom who made our capes and my suit. I even got to eat at my favourite hometown diner once more before they permanently closed their doors at the end of November. RIP Prince Albert’s Diner. I also saw Phil Collins in concert once more with his band Genesis!
I celebrated a year of being in therapy and feel like I have become a better and stronger person from it. I am learning to enforce my boundaries and trust my gut a little more. I am cutting people out who don’t benefit and enrich me anymore and not feeling guilty about it. I am leaning into this healthy relationship I am in and being vulnerable and learning to let him take care of me even if it’s difficult for me.
2022 wasn’t without the sad stuff too. My cousin Julio passed away suddenly in early October. I am now the keeper of his Bronco bear which is one of my most cherished treasures. I also sat with my friend Bea while her cat passed away in her arms. An experience that shook me to the core and reminded me of my own cat’s mortality and gratitude he is still with me in the new year.
2021 didn’t end how I had hoped though. During the last week of December I got sick with COVID and passed it to Andrew. We both spent New Year’s Eve in bed. It sucked because I was really looking forward to our week off together. I still have a lot of guilt and sadness towards that final week but I am learning to let it go and be appreciative of my partner who didn’t push me away when I was ill. He offered to take care of me and risked his own health to do so. He cheered me up and comforted me when I cried from the body aches and the sadness I had for ruining the week. I really hope 2022 is the end of this virus in its Pandemic scale although I know it’s probably here to stay and we will have to learn to live with it.
For 2022 I hope for more growth. I want to be more confident in my skills and in the decisions I make for myself. I hope to continue my therapy throughout the year and unlearn some of the unhealthy habits from my upbringing I haven’t shaken off yet. I hope to travel! I have some travel plans outside of Canada in the works and a fun idea to celebrate my 35th birthday milestone this year. I hope my relationships both romantic and platonic continue to blossom and I put more effort in the people who matter the most to me. I hope to find a job opportunity that will allow me to be a leader, be more creative and provide a substantial pay raise while I’m at it.
Cheers to 2022! May it bring health, happiness and success to us all. (Picture of Little Chairman Mao for cuteness tax.)
The Catty Critic 